Jesus isn't sexist...

...so it must be me.
Maybe I would have had an easier time with men, if I had always been a Christian or maybe I wouldn't have. But one thing I have become convinced of, is I am sexist and it is bad. Just as bad as men being sexist against women, just as sickening as women being sexist against women. It's all bad...bad is bad is bad. Anyway having got myself into a tiz about it, I am now going to pray about it until the blackness has gone because sin, whatever or rather which ever one, makes me cry too much; too much to do the washing and the dishes, too much to sleep and get up...and the only person I know who can do anything about sin, is Jesus. And the only person I know who isn't remotely sexist is Jesus.

Here's the hope, 2 Samuel 13

I didn't explain Tamar properly!
Without Jesus, we are all desolate women.
Church is where we go to see him, where we go worship, where we go to bow down, where we go to say Jesus is Lord, he reigns, he is alive, because of him we are not desolate women. Don't look at your own wounds, look at Jesus' wounds.
I hope that is clearer.

where is hope? 2 Samuel 13

Recently I have been mainly traumatised. So I started reading 2 Samuel and became even more traumatised.
If you haven't read chapter 13, it is a brutal story of lust, envy, violence, the destruction of innocence and murder; in short it's a little slice of hell.
I'm sure I'm not the only person who has ever lived in hell.
What is true about hell is there is no way out.
So Tamar finds herself in hell, and no one can get her out, so she lives as "a desolate woman."
If you read it...you'll know she isn't mentioned again, you may tear through the following two chapters looking for her, looking for the upturn, looking for Jesus...but do you know what?
He's not there.

desolate

des·o·late   [adj. des-uh-lit; v. des-uh-leyt]  Show IPA adjective, verb, des·o·lat·ed, des·o·lat·ing.
adjective
1.
barren or laid waste; devastated: a treeless, desolate landscape.
2.
deprived or destitute of inhabitants; deserted; uninhabited.
3.
solitary; lonely: a desolate place.
4.
having the feeling of being abandoned by friends or by hope; forlorn.
5.
dreary; dismal; gloomy: desolate prospects.

And after sulking for a week, I finally realised not only have I lived as a desolate woman, but also without Jesus, without my church... I would still be living as a desolate woman. In fact I'm a breathe away, a click of the fingers away. Without Jesus I am a desolate woman.
So if I ever feature in your prayers, I don't want a car, a house or a pay rise, please pray for more Jesus for me; my prayer for you is the same.